2012 review

I don't have a 2012 review in pictures because one of the things that happened in 2012 was that my Mac became a brick.  Things are in there and safe (I hope) I just can't access them.  So eventually I'll need to attempt recovery but it's expensive.

So this is my 2012 review as it is.

2012 wasn't the best year but it wasn't the worst year.

In January I started my nursing classes, in December I finished my 2nd semester and graduated as an LPN.  I have had a lot of ups and downs and a lot of crazy days, weeks, and months.  The greatest thing is the people I have met and the friends I have that understand me at school.  I really couldn't make it without them. 

In March Mike and I celebrated TEN wonderful years of marriage. I really can not believe that it's been 10 years already.  Some days I feel like we just got married and others I feel like I never existed before we were married.  I'm so completely in love with that man, he makes my heart skip a beat and my stomach have butterflies just by walking through the door.  He understands me, he gets me, and we have the  same warped sense of humor.

September brought kindergarten for Gabe.  All day, every day.  He loves it.  He did have two first days in a row because of the school snafu but since he got a kitten out of it (Frieda) I don't think he minded much.  She's a little stinker and perfect for our family, super curious, not afraid of anything and ready to cause trouble.  She sleeps with him at night too.  Gabe is in Speech and making great progress.  He was in the winter concert and so adorable.  The concert has been the highlight of my mom career so far!! It was so adorable!!

December was one of tears and smiles.  My Grandpa passed away on the first.  Everyone is managing but we will always miss him.  He was an awesome guy and the best Grandpa I could have ever asked for.

Gabe turned SIX on the 23rd!!  I can not believe that my little baby is six.  He is an amazing kid.  I really couldn't have imagined how being his mom would feel.  We are so lucky to have him as ours.  He is quite the funny little kid.  He tells knock knock jokes, makes up stories, loves Legos, anything building related, stories and books.  He's sitting on the floor building with Legos right now, some machine that will probably fly, drive, and float if he has his way.  Being his mom rocks even when he drives me crazy ;)

In 2013 I look forward to getting back on track health wise, school through me off track but it's time to stop the excuses!!  I look forward to graduating school in December!  I look forward to my 11th anniversary, to turning 31, to Gabe being 7 and all the crazy ups and downs that I can't really even begin to imagine might happen but I feel like 2013 is going to be a long, tough year but good.  I just feel it.  Be a good year, be a good year! 

Gabe's 6th birthday

Today you turn 6.  I am amazed every year how old you are, how big you are and how much you've changed in one year.

This year I've been a bad blogger, picture taker, documenter.  I admit it, sorry kiddo.

You've started kindergarten, got your very own kitten Frieda and have grown and learned so much!  You still love Cars (KACHOW!), trucks, building things, legos and today you even put your new lego set together all by yourself by using the directions!  You can write and draw and spell, it amazes me how much you've learned in kindergarten already!!  You had a winter concert where you were on stage and sang your heart out! I'd been waiting for that part of being a mom and videoing that was so much fun. And while this year has had it's ups and downs you've handled them all and been a great kid through everything.

I love you so very much my little boy, I love that you're a big kid and funny and cute and still give me kisses.  Best Christmas Gift I've ever gotten was you.  Love you.

Kindy Xmas Party!

Finding your people

I once had a very wise friend of mine tell me that the really lucky nurses found their people early and if I was lucky enough to do that, stay there and never move.  She's probably too busy in med school now to even be reading this but she knows who she is. 

Today at clinical I'm pretty sure I found where I'm supposed to be.  I've had an interest in hospice nursing since I started school and today I had a patient that was going home with hospice.  I know what that means, and she knows what that means.  We had an amazing day today (at least I hope she did because I know I did).  Her day went better than several previous ones, that's for sure.  She may never know it but this woman probably impacted me in a profound and life changing way.  I know that there are people out there waiting for me.  They need me, we just don't know each other yet and hospice is the place that I want to be. 

I'm aware that a lot of people think I might be crazy, and they might even think I can't do it, but I know better.  I know that deep down inside me I FEEL something.  I feel connected and I feel drawn.  I only hope that I can be the person that those people need me to be.  I know that being a hospice nurse might not be easy, and that many days it is going to be extra hard but that's okay because there are going to be a ton of wonderful days in there too. 

If I made today better for my one patient then I did a good job.  I'm so thankful for the chance I had to meet her.  I'm thankful that my instructor gave me that chance, even though I know she was nervous about me being ready for it. 

Today I did good, and I want to say thank you to that special patient whom I will carry forever with me. 

Gabe Kindergarten school starting

We are a couple weeks into kindergarten and it seems like Gabe is enjoying himself.  Of course getting information out of him is like getting information from a CIA agent, so it's hard to tell.

Now the fun part so I don't forget when he's older:

The school directly across the street from us (90 feet away) was full, which led to a fiasco of sending him to the other side of town, a ONE HOUR bus ride on the way home, etc.  After several emails with the principal and the superintendent of the schools we were told that we would be first on the list if there was an opening at our own school.  So Gabe started school across town at Kennedy Elementary School.  I received a phone call THAT DAY that there was an opening at Woodview.  Poor kid had two first days in a row, one at the "wrong" school and then the second day at the "correct" school.  He was a little confused to say the least, but at least he only had to do one day in the wrong place. 

He seems to like school so far, I haven't had any notes home about him being in trouble so he must be alright LOL!  Here's to hoping things continue to run smoothly!  I quite enjoy being able to see him on the playground during the day, and having him home only 5 min after school lets out. 

On turning 30!

Yes it is that time again, my birthday.  There was no big count down or surprise party or sky diving but it did come anyhow, sort of like in the Grinch, it comes no matter what we do ;)

I think a lot of people feel like 30 is a OMG MILESTONE! so I figured I should too.  Except I don't, sort of, clear as mud right?  At 25 I was pretty scared of what 30 might look like, but now I'm thrilled to be here (beats the alternative right?), and I'm ready to BRING. IT. ON.

I'd like to take this time to tell my younger self a few things.

At 18 and 19 I'd make sure that I enjoyed my brand new husband, and that we'd just get in the car more and drive places.  I'd make sure to let myself know that things will never be how you planned, but they will be better than you ever dreamed.

At 25 I'd tell myself that you're doing a great job as a mom, and things won't get easier, but they won't really get harder either, they'll just change.  (Gabe was 8 months old when I turned 25).  Be confident in yourself and your choices.  They'll work out okay.

Yes you should go to school, no it won't be for a vet tech it will be for nursing (blows your mind right?!) why didn't you think of that at 18 or 19?  I think because you'll be a better nurse now than you would have then.

In the 30 years you might not have done anything that the world will remember or will write about but you do have a family that loves you and that does make you important.  I know that you will continue to grow and change and push yourself, just keep swimming!

In my next 30 years (hey I know that song!)  I'd like to have some fun.  I'd like to conquer more fears and work on being braver.  I want to try things that scare me, go places jut because they sound fun and try to just say YES to things that come my way more.  I want to spend more time with my family and really really enjoy them, and not worry so much about the other eleventymillion things that I "think" are important, because what's important is right there in front of me.

No one could really have prepared me for what I'd be like at 30.  The things about myself that have stayed the same and those that have changed.  I feel more comfortable in myself now that I did in my 20s.  I feel like this is me and take it or leave it.  I feel that I'm going to always be a work in progress and that is a good thing.  I mean after all if we get stagnant we'd die so we SHOULD be a work in progress and always growing and changing.

I'd like to tell my husband that he's amazing and that I love him and I know exactly how lucky I am to have found the love of my life so early on!

I'd like to tell my parents that I love them, and that I'm really grateful for all the hard work they put into me, even when we drive each other crazy.

I'd like to tell my brother that I'm glad we're friends now and we hang out.  I wasn't sure that we'd ever get there but now I can't imagine not having him around.

And now I'm crying, silly me!

Your 30s look like they are going to be great, embrace them! Love them! Don't hide your age, embrace it and be the best you that you can be!! Thirty can just BRING. IT. ON! 

Happy Birthday to me!

Safety Town

Gabe finished Safety Town on Friday and it was great.  I think we learned a lot, him and I both!  He's definitely working on learning his phone number much better now.  He's got his address down.  He learned lots of other things while there too.  I think the most important thing was really that we need to make sure we're working on some of the things I know Gabe needs to learn each and every day so we don't end up overwhelmed and frustrated (both of us). 

I think that it was a great learning experience for him and me.  He got great responses from the teachers about being a good kid and listening well, of course I hear that he's the ham too.  He does need to work on some paying attention skills which I know is the age and the fact that he's had very little structured learning.  I think as a whole he is ready for kindergarten in the fall.  I'm going to bet that we do end up doing some speech therapy but I think at this point I'm going to wait it out and just see how things go when he starts school.

Gabe is really enjoying the summer so far and he loves being outside and especially playing with Matthew and Sarah.  He will play in the pool in the yard all day if I let him, and he will be taking swimming classes next month.  I'm hoping that will help him to get his face in the water and not panic if someone splashes him.  

All in all things are good and we're having a fun summer.  I do wish that we had a car during the day to just bop around places but we'll make it through and soon I'll be back in school and suddenly so will he!

Should I or shouldn't I? You decide!

In just 4 days I'll have technically completed Jillian Michael's 30 Day Shred.  I pushed back my end date so that I will have gotten 30 workouts but I think I'm still short one or two.  Still all things considered it's pretty cool.  I actually like the work out. 

I'm looking for the next thing I should do.  If it's on Netflix or free somewhere on the internet even better!  So give me your ideas.  I like things that are in the 30 min range because I have time for that even with the kiddo home with me during the day in the summer, and during the school year that's all I'll likely be able to commit to on any one day. 

I'm not sure if I'll post the before and after pictures or not, because I took the before pictures in my sports bra and workout pants and I'm not really happy about sharing the stretch marks on the internet.  But I'll make sure I take two sets of after, one without the tank top on and one with, so you'll get a current picture of me.  I haven't lost much weight this month (I think the scale lies) but I'm obviously stronger now than I was when I started so I'm hoping that shows. I might be persuaded but it would have to be by a lot of people LOL!

Mike and I started doing water aerobics twice a week.  It is sort of fun actually.  We are the only people under about 70 years old but that's okay, they're inviting us to play Bridge :)  I did tell Mike I wanted to meet new couples but this wasn't quite what I had in mind.  At least we're doing something together and it is exercise.  Plus in the water is good for Mike because even if it has been 90 out Mike feels comfortable in the water.  I'm really thinking about a pool for us, something decent sized. 

Are you up for the challenge?  Convince me to post the actual before pictures.  And sell me your workout videos and where I can find them.